Saying Thank You and Goodbye

Only fourteen days into my challenge I have to make a tough, tough, tough decision.

I have a favorite t-shirt. I inherited it from my mother-in-law, who had put it in a pile of clothes she was going to donate to the Salvation Army two years ago at Christmas time. I loved the color: a pretty blush pink. I loved the fit: a few little buttons on the front. I loved the texture: lightweight and fluid.

It did not take me long to figure out why the item was going to be donated: it was full of little holes. Not moth holes, mind you. The material was simply poor quality, constantly making new little holes. I loved the t-shirt so much that I mended those holes for two years, each time the mending becoming more conspicuous. Pretty soon I couldn’t even keep up. I was mending it before, during and after every single time I wore the t-shirt.

Even today, as I think about finally retiring this t-shirt, I think, “Oh, I’ll just wear it one more time. Just once…” I have been saying that for about a year and half.

So today is the day. Today is the last time I am going to wear my favorite, perfect blush-colored t-shirt. Tonight, when I take it off, I am going to thank it for its service. I am going to tear it into rags and use it dust my piano.

Having a plan for the t-shirt once it is no longer wearable makes me feel a touch less guilty, but I still have a little bit of that awful sense of regret, similar to what I have felt when I have had to take a beloved pet to the vet, knowing she wouldn’t be coming home.

This t-shirt has no bad memories attached to it. It always brought me joy to wear it. And yet I have to say goodbye to it. It feels like a low-budget tragedy.

So: Dear lovely blush-colored t-shirt: thank you for bringing me joy every single time I wore you. Thank you for giving me practice mending. Thank you for helping me discover a color I didn’t know I would love. By exiting the Pantheon, you are making room for something else that has been ignored for too long to become a favorite.

Dust in Peace.

Published by Lily Fields

I am passionate about contentment. This is a challenge, because I am equally passionate about progress. I get up at 4:00AM to chip away at a solution to this monolithic problem: how to make progress on my contentment. Born and raised in the USA, I married a French philosophy teacher in 1999. We have lived in France since 2007. We stayed young and carefree until life threw us two curveballs in the form of little humans one after another in 2015 and 2017 respectively. Now I am a slightly older, slightly more exhausted version of myself, but with mystery stains on my walls and a never-ending pile of laundry.

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